The most common relationships people have with money

I see these in myself and also in the people around me. The idea of this section is not to judge or blame. It is to know,  so you can use that knowledge to your advantage.

  1. Screamer. “Hey wena, money doesn’t grow on trees! “ Does this sound familiar?
  2. Retail therapy. Are you one of those people who go shopping with a credit card whenever they are angry or sad?
  3. Spending money we don’t have to impress people we don’t like. Are you dressing yourself to financial ruin to impress people in your office, especially the ones you don’t like?
  4. Competing with people we like. Being friends with someone doesn’t mean you have to have what they have. Some people will always have more than we do and others will always have less than we do.
  5. Cinderella. ……Wouldn’t it be nice if your Prince Charming could find you when you have a sense of security because you take care of your needs? If you marry him, it is for love, not because you need someone to take care of you.
  6. One-night stand. Are you waiting by the ATM at midnight on your pay day to withdraw your money before the debit orders take all of it away?
  7. Cash cow. I have met so many cash cows in my life and most of them have a sense of anger, resentment and despair. They are usually kind and well-meaning people but they have been taken advantage of by those they love.They are so good at taking care of others that everyone has come to depend on them. They think about the wellbeing of everyone else and, sadly, very few people think about the wellbeing of the cash cow. They are usually surrounded by very dependent people with learned helplessness and, in some cases, pure selfishness.In some cases, cash cows have put themselves into financial ruin as they try to take care of everyone. They have signed sureties, taken car loans in their own names for their sisters and brothers who are not credit worthy, and have given loans that are never repaid. After all, their families may think, why work when you have a cash cow in the family? Why save money or take out life cover?Are you a cash cow? Don’t allow “smart” people to take advantage of you. Learn to put your needs first. Give only if giving makes you feel good. The moment you feel taken advantage of, that is the signal that you should stop. If someone loves you, they will love you even if you don’t give them money. If they stop loving you because you don’t give them money any more, then you are better off. At least you know who loves you for you and who loves you for the free rides.
  8. Taker. These are the people who receive or take from everyone, especially the cash cows in their families. Takers always claim to be out of pocket. They may work but they just never contribute to anything. They often have what they want as they are good at getting what they want. It is not unusual for a taker to simply leave his or her job and complain the job doesn’t pay enough. When takers are out of a job, they expect everyone to take care of them. Some takers even have children and expect cash cows in their family to look not only after them but their children too. Some people never grow out of being takers. They could be very old and still have no idea how to give and how to be content with what they have.If you are a taker, ask yourself if you would be happy if others were to start taking from you. I’m sure you wouldn’t like that. So don’t do it to others as well.
  9. I want it all and I want it NOW. Have you ever seen an “I want it all and I want it now” person? This person seems to have it all: a good car, nice clothes and all the good things that we can see. When they open their purses or wallets, then you see all the credit cards and store cards.  Having it all and having it now is expensive as debt is expensive.
  10. Fear of money. Some people fear money. They never talk about money because they fear they don’t have enough. They also fear that they will never have enough money.Sometimes people with lots of money can fear money too. They overwork themselves, even though they have made it, because they fear they might lose it. They don’t trust anyone and think everyone is after their money.
  11. Love of money. Some people love money, and money to them is the most important possession. They will sometimes trample on others and do whatever it takes, as long as it gets them more money than they already have. Money defines who they are and who they talk to. Sometimes they let children, partners and family take a back seat – it’s money first, and everything else later.
  12. Worry about money. Have you ever come across someone who always worries about money? When they have it, they worry they might lose it. When they don’t have it, they worry they will never have it. It doesn’t matter therefore whether they do or don’t have money, they will worry anyway.
  13. Level-headed about money. These people know what is important in life; they take care of themselves first, and give only when they want to. They never give out of a sense of obligation or guilt. They usually have what they need.
Look out for a copy of Ndumo’s new book coming out in a few days. Available where books are sold on 13 September for only R130 a copy
Look out for a copy of Ndumo’s new book coming out in a few days. Available where books are sold on 13 September for only R130 a copy

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